How strange.

Bloody hell, the Sun!

It's been a while but it's bloody good to see you old friend!

Why don't you hang around for a while? You could do a job swap with the rain and give those drought ridden countries a break. Whilst you're here you could dry up all of our flood water and compensate us for your no-show last summer.

speaking of which - what happened to you in 2007? We really did miss you. After your early appearance in April we all thought we were in for a corker of a summer but noooo, you had other ideas. You left us a the mercy of that nasty wet stuff and gave us moaning Brits even more to moan about. As someone of the optimistic persuasion even I found it difficult not to succumb to the odd dreaded grumble.

What other nation on earth goes to such great lengths to bask in your glory? Every year we flock to the Costa Del Sol on our £1 Easy Jet flight just to catch up with you. We've enslaved Mediterranean towns into service, forcing them to serve us paella, washed down with cheap booze and Roy chubby Brown videos.

Sun tan lotion? Never heard of it. We're a nation of die hard sun worshipers and anything that stops us from absorbing your full effect is blasphemy.

Even our favourite newspaper (allegedly) is named after you.

So please please please stick around for a while longer!